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Sunday’s are my lazy day. I rarely do anything (even write) and generally just try and zone out. I do things like watch anime, read manga, read novels, watch the Cowboys game, and harass my big brother until that cute little vein in his forehead (I call it Fred) pops out.

Today, I spent it in the hospital with Rebecca (who still hasn’t left my side) watching him sleep.

He has yet to regain consciousness. He’s otherwise healthy; the doctor’s say he has a good chance of snapping out of this. His best friend, the person that was driving the car, wasn’t so lucky: he died about 13 hours ago. It’s going to devastate my brother when he learns.

I want to take a moment and thank all of you for sending us good wishes and vibes – I feel them, and they are very much appreciated. I mean that. I honestly appreciate the time you take out of your day to think about the gravity of our situation. It’s touching, and very much needed. You guys are the only thing keeping me from having a mental break.

You and Rebecca. I don’t deserve her love and sympathy right now, but it speaks volumes about her character that she’s giving it. You know who’s not giving it? Ivy, AKA face seat. She knows what’s going on, knows how it’s affecting me, yet hasn’t reached out at all. So, fuck her. And I hope she’s reading this. If you are, don’t bother texting me, calling me, or coming over anymore. You’re dead to me. Even if Rebecca and I don’t get back together, she’s being my rock in all this, even though she has absolutely no reason to be. She is ten times the woman that you are.

In every single way.

I’m lucky to have her. Maybe I shouldn’t have been so quick to break it off with her…I have a lot of thinking to do…

Until tomorrow loves.

Keep me (and my brother) in your thoughts.





“In my heart, I really don’t care who you love, same sex or not; as long as you have the ability to love, that’s the important thing here.”
– Tracy Morgan


  1. EJ on 12th November 2017 at 10:44 pm

    Fuck, I’m so sorry to hear about you and your brother’s friend, Alexa! Words can’t describe the emotions and feelings that a person goes through UNLESS they actually experience that tragic event personally! Like I said before, I’m always here for you if you need to just vent to someone because I know that Rebecca and Natalie also probably have a lot going through their minds as well, because I’m sure Rebecca and the bro unit probably got close in at least SOME degree with as much time as she spent there with you while you were together! You have my email if you need it, sweetheart! <3

  2. Richie on 13th November 2017 at 11:30 am

    Hi Alexa, Wow… We’re so sorry about hearing that things are really bad there. It must have been a terrible accident to have one fatality and the passenger in a coma-like stage.

    Some questions: Are you able to work at your regular job during the week or do you stay at the hospital all day? Is the hospital far from you or did the accident occur close to your area? Did you brother hit his head? What do the doctors say about him having no physical injuries but yet he is in a deep sleep?

    How is Natalie holding up?

    Our thoughts are with you and your family and friends, Alexa.

    All the best,

    Richie and Randi

    • Alexa Nichols on 13th November 2017 at 9:26 pm

      Yeah, the accident was horrible. Both cars are totaled. I have no idea how the other driver/passengers are doing, and I honestly don’t care. From what I’m told, the driver in the other car – and his friends – were wasted drunk. Want to know how I’m feeling about them? Re-read “The Secret Life of Miel”. Miel is, after all, a reflection of my darker side. If my brother dies because of them…

      I am able to go to my regular job, but I wish I could stay in the hospital with him all day. The accident was semi-close; he was on his way home to me when it happened. He had just sent me a text saying he’d see me in a few minutes (he was in the passenger’s seat) and that he loved me.

      Natalie is not holding up well. She’s gone into panic mode, even worse than I have. Well, maybe not “worse”, but definitely more outwardly. All of my panic and torment is internal.

      Thank for the questions, the concern, and the thoughts. I appreciate you and your wife so much.

      For reals.

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