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Fight me

3f5c0b0c44265cb18ee189a4a0ec8695Dear Diary,

 

(ALARM CLOCK GOES OFF)

(I reach out and slap it off the table.)

(Which doesn’t silence said alarm clock, of course.)

(I don’t care. It’s farther away from me now, and that’s all that matters.)

(15 Minutes later, big brother slings my door open fully dressed and – as always – smelling good. He reaches down and turns my alarm off, returning it to my table.)

 

J.C. (said big brother): “Alexa. Get up.”

Me: “Fight me, motherfucker.”

J.C.: (Raises eyebrow.) “Anne’s expecting you. Get up.”

Me: (Reach over and whip cover down beside me, revealing Anne, who is still somehow snot-bubble sleeping.) “Her expectations are pretty low this morning.”

J.C.: (Looking slightly startled) “When did she get here?”

Me: “Right before WrestleMania last night. We watched it together. Make me breakfast.”

J.C.: “Get up first.”

Me: “Make me breakfast first.”

J.C.: “Get up. Then we’ll talk breakfast.”

Me: (Make lower lip quiver, force eyes to water, look up at him.) “Please? My stomach hurts and I don’t feel good and I think I’m coming down with something and I don’t even wanna get up and my whole body hurts and I don’t know why and I love you so much and I don’t ask much and by the way where the fuck is Skynet I can’t find it anywhere I know you hid it please make me a breakfast sandwich and carry me to the kitchen?”

J.C.: (Deadpan voice.) “Seriously?”

(I nod and force a tear to eject from my eye.)

J.C.: “You are entirely too spoiled, you know that?”

Me: (Nodding as he picks me up out of bed like I’m made of paper and begins carrying me to the kitchen.)

Anne: “I want one too.”

Me: “Already on it, girl.”

 

So yeah. That was actually how my day started. Thing is, I actually didn’t lie to the big brother unit: I feel like someone beat the shit out of me and stuffed me in bed, then gangbanged me senseless twice. I nearly took the day off entirely, but something inside told me not to, so I didn’t. I got up, finished the yellow revision of Naughty Professor, worked on a good chunk of the red revision for Knocking Up The MILF, skipped lunch entirely and took a nap instead (best decision of the day), managed to knock out all of my author tasks, spruced up the website a bit,

and then fell face first in my bed and didn’t move for the rest of the day.

I really hope this goes away tomorrow, as I have too many projects I want to get done and some short time limits to do them in. I guess I’ll see tomorrow if this is just a brief, fleeting thing or if it’s a bonafide sickness.

Cross your fingers, my loves.

And as always, thank you for reading…

#Alexa

 

💡 The More You Know 💡

Amazon River Dolphins are the only species of animal recorded to have engaged in nasal sex.

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12 Comments

  1. Anne Barrett on April 9, 2018 at 10:17 pm

    I know you not feeling well get some rest tonight. I love you girl. Have a great night sleep tight

  2. Lamar on April 9, 2018 at 10:25 pm

    Outside the penis incident, you sure had a decent but lazy day. Besides, you’ll be back on your feet in quite no time. 😊❤ I hope you’re not getting sick again.

    I seriously though wanted to kick that guy’s ass and no one gross out my Alexa and gets away with it. 😡

    • Alexa Nichols on April 10, 2018 at 9:56 pm

      Guess what? I’m back on my feet! 😅 And thank you for wanting to kick his ass. That says a lot about you. Don’t change, boo boo! 💖

  3. keremgoestovegas on April 9, 2018 at 10:47 pm

    I just realized I’ve never left comment here – so this will be the first. Congrats on finishing your author tasks and I hope feel better soon 🙂

    • Alexa Nichols on April 10, 2018 at 9:57 pm

      FINALLY! 😅 And I like the avatar you used! Thank you for reading, commenting, and being you. 😍

      • Kerem on April 17, 2018 at 2:49 pm

        I’m flattered and honored – I don’t even know or understand how that avatar showed up! Mysteries of the internet. And I just noticed your reply because stupid G-mail moved the notification e-mail to spam folder; which made me upset.

        • Alexa Nichols on April 17, 2018 at 9:08 pm

          It’s OK! Just mark me as not spam from now on! 😊

  4. Ronnie Mullins on April 10, 2018 at 6:30 am

    Are you spoiled like the brother unit says you are? Feel better sweetie and good luck getting all your author stuff done

    • Alexa Nichols on April 10, 2018 at 10:00 pm

      I hate to admit it, but I am spoiled – in a sense. I mean, I work HARD, and I do A LOT for the people I love, but… I think my brother spoils me because he feels guilty about my childhood; he holds himself responsible, no matter how many times I tell him it’s not his fault. The truth is, my past made me strong, smart, and resourceful – but what girl doesn’t like to be spoiled every now and then? 😅

  5. Richie on April 10, 2018 at 10:37 am

    C H I C K E N S O U P!

    • Alexa Nichols on April 10, 2018 at 10:01 pm

      You must be Anne’s spirit animal, I swear! 😅 She injected so much Chicken Noodle Soup in me… I can’t complain though – I am about 80% normal now. Maybe there is some truth to the myth…

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