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Dear Diary,

Have you ever seriously thought about the meaning of dreams? Ever since I was a little girl they’ve fascinated me, and when I started becoming interested in psychology it was the first topic I began to heavily research. I experimented with lucid dreaming, dabbled in dream manipulation on both myself and my friends/relatives, and for the longest time even kept a dream journal to study, hoping to find some sort of correlation with my waking life and the things I mused while I slept.

They still fascinate me to this day. You may be able to tell this from my writing, as they often creep into my tales in one way or another.

Unsurprisingly, I tend to have weird dreams myself. Most of the time these are harmless, odd affairs, but sometimes… they can get dark. Not too long ago, I dreamt of my death, the first of its kind, which shook me to my core. I wrote about it in my Diary and even reached out and talked to some of my Patreon and Subscribestar members, and to be honest that helped a bit, but it took days for me to completely shake the powerful emotions it elicited. And then, just yesterday, I had yet another dream, one where I was shot multiple times in the head. I have no idea where these dreams are coming from or why, as I haven’t been watching any gun-heavy shows, but… this time, it didn’t unsettle me as badly as the first. It was more a curiosity than an impactful event, so much so that when I awoke, I casually told my baby squirrel and then bounded about my day.

I don’t know what these dreams mean.

I’m not sure I want to know.

The way I see it, however, I have two choices: agonize over what they could possibly entail or go on about my life and tackle the things that make me happy for as long as I’m in this world. I choose the latter.

How do dreams affect you? What do you believe they mean? Send me an email or private message through one of my various social media accounts and let me know. I’m genuinely curious.



“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”

Carl Jung


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  1. Lamar on January 4, 2023 at 7:24 pm

    To be honest with you, those type of dreams tend to happen to me sometimes and stuff like having a toothpick though the nose and waking up in cold sweat. It probably means it might’ve happened in an different lifetime in another.

    Your dreams could be that your old life before you in your current form on how you died and its truly spooky. 😬😥

    But, I have to agree on the latter and carry on!

    • Alexa Nichols on January 10, 2023 at 2:53 pm

      I can’t wait for the day when we can record our dreams – or develop a system to experience them lucidly. I may never want to wake up! 😁

      • Lamar on April 24, 2023 at 1:00 pm

        Me too! I want something similar to that machine in Demolition Man! 😄

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